Try gently—key word, gently—tugging on his lower lip with your teeth during a kiss. None of us are born good kissers! Biting lips and gentle pulling is the most teasing thing you can do but it can be the biggest kissing blunder if you overdo it, so keep in mind that this is a delicate action that needs to be done as gently as possible. On the other end of the spectrum though, most of us have the common decency to not tell someone to his or her face that it was a terrible experience. If you slow down and your partner speeds up, you can respond to that by meeting them halfway, or speeding up to meet their energy, whichever you're feeling. Even if you have the most awesome kissing technique and have mastered the art of as if French kissing was named after you, you will not be thought of as a good kisser if you try to kiss someone that is not really ready to kiss you right there and then. Take note of what your partner's doing and imitate it.
If you're in an intimate situation with someone, it's also important to as well. Be specific, be effusive, and be happy, New York—based and author April Masini, tells Bustle. This will get things moving in the right direction without being overwhelming. One time, I was having a quiet conversation with a girl and when I leaned in to kiss her she instantly attacked my face like a starving fish eating from the top of an aquarium! When it comes to success, of any kind, it involves compromise. Rub the back of their neck during the kiss and put your all into it! However, there are definitely some things that you want to avoid as the kiss gets deeper.
Your tongue should never be long, wet and limp; this person's face should never have a wet upper lip, wet lower lip, wet cheek or wet chin. If you are questioning whether or not your partner is having fun while kissing, you are not fully present in the moment, Kors says. If the two of you kiss similarly, chances are the kiss is going to be great. This is especially important at the beginning of a kiss, which should normally start off slow and soft. Take Your Time Kissing is a team effort.
As preceding chapters have described, women depend heavily on taste and smell and pay close attention to teeth when evaluating a partner. That begs the question then: How do we know where we stand when it comes to kissing? In hindsight, the dude was cute and friendly, but a dork obviously, he was a freshman in college badly kissing a freshman in high school. It's kind of like a good classical music piece. Tilting your head more and switching the position of your lips on your partner's can keep things interesting for both of you. If the , or tries to tilt their head to adjust to how you're kissing them, a psychologist, relationship expert, and author of , tells Bustle, then that's a pretty obvious sign that they're trying to tell you they're not enjoying themselves as much as you are. Kissing should be an enjoyable activity.
Non-romantic kisses are appropriate for friends and family members who you care for deeply. Kissing is like a dance, Kors says. I went on one date with him and he felt it was okay to stick his sloppy tongue in my ear. There are over 30 types of kisses described in the Kama Sutra. This definitely spices things up between you two. As you bite their bottom lip, add a bit of suction as well. We totally understand where he is coming from.
Try starting out slow and small with no tongue and cranking up the intensity as a kiss gets more passionate. Consider putting your arms around your partner. Start by allowing your partner to take the lead. The technique is super important because it can make or break the kiss before the kissing even begins. While a dinner date before an anticipated kiss can be romantic, eating pungent foods that give you bad breath can be a kiss-killer. Ladies, moisturize your lips on a frequent basis.
Circumstances can hamper things as well. Even better, carry around an extra toothbrush and toothpaste and quickly brush the odor away. Your partner will definitely freak out when they open their eyes and realize that you have been staring at them the entire time you guys were making out. Your partner will notice, for instance, if your body feels tense. Make sure you have fresh breath.
A good kisser knows not to only focus on kissing his or her partner on the mouth. It is a bit like Jaws—you see it coming and then the attack happens. The hottest kisses are full of passion: Her hands should be on my neck, on my face, or playing with my hair. Hickeys aren't exactly everyone's cup of tea, so don't bite down or latch on unless your partner indicates that they're into it. When kissing, it should feel as if the two of you are focused on each other and the rest of the world blurs around you.
If somebody is super aggressive at first, the whole thing is going to be thrown out of whack. Or you like one of these tips and would like to see how to incorporate it into your love life. This goes back to the whole idea of being in tune with one another. A good kisser uses his or her tongue to gently tease and caress the lips and tongue of his or her partner. That was my first great kiss, and I remember it very clearly. So by expressing passion, such as gently grabbing his hair, softly kissing his lips and face, moaning a little, or holding on to him, this lets him know you are happy being with him.